All of us want to find that one true love of our life. As a teenager we read love stories and fantasize about that ‘special’ someone that will ‘complete us’. As we get older and venture our feelings out into the ‘real’ world, this sometimes works out and sometimes - not so much.
We pick ourselves up and try again but this time saying that we have learned an important lesson; actually it is usually several lessons. Our heart becomes strong again and we seek companionship, yet once again. This is what we do. We are humans and need, require and desire companionship. This does not mean that we are not a complete person without it, but more whole with it, or so we want to believe. Don’t misunderstand me; I’m all for love and the entire imaginable and unimaginable aspects one can think of with this word but…
I am an admirer of Bollywood movies and I only acquire movies I know I will want to see again and again. Umrao Jaan is one such movie, with Aishwarya Rai. I have difficulty watching this one repeatedly since the lovers are doomed not to be together in their present lifetime. What I wonder is even though they were not allowed to marry, could they still spend seven lifetimes together? I hope so. Umrao was so devoted to this man and of course the reason they did not marry seemed so senseless to the viewer - that is if you get involved as I do with my movie characters.
This started out as a blog regarding a love that we all seek at some point in our lives, some of us throughout our lives. For me there is a slight twist and I am hoping that this might hit somewhat of a familiar cord with some of you. Please bear with me.
I am talking about someone who you may have known in another lifetime. Now please stay with me here. Yes - I believe in reincarnation. Frankly, I am still confused as to why more people don’t. But that’s another blog. I meditate on a regular basis and getting in touch with my higher self took some time. At first it appeared to me as an androgynous being, then as a hawk and now as Hawk. Now I know some, if not most, caught the capital H and probably a few of you got the meaning behind this.
Yes I have an entity living with me and yes he is very real and yes he is Native. He is also quite good looking. And yes I can see him when I need to. This took years. Now the really juicy part is - he’s a great lover. You still with me, I hope so?
It’s not something I could talk about a couple of years ago without the fear that my 20-something year old daughter might not feel her mom had gone off the deep end. But that was before I met a friend, a gifted friend who read some of my work and knew of Hawk. Her comment was that you have to write about him. You already are but because you’re not admitting it, your writing has no truth to it. So I stopped the project I was on and began our story, of sorts.
I don’t know if there will be another blog about this, but there will be a book at some point in the near future.
I guess the purpose for this is that whatever your truth is, and God knows this one scared the hell out of me in the beginning, own it. You’ll be happier for it. I know I am.